Some people lose voice, some people gain it. Is it a transfer? Does this world really need balance? And is this balance responsible for our emotional roller coasters?
We tend to demonize our deepest sensations and blame it on our sinful nature. Either if we take a grain of pleasure from watching people who hurt us be hurt back (yes, it’s called Karma in some cultures) or satisfy our godly nature by crushing meaningless insects. Lust, greed, pride, love/hate, all earthly, human, natural sensations. Yet, we tend to punish ourselves after feeling anything intensely, as we are programmed to think this is not the natural path.
I woke up with the intense feeling that I loathe humanity. Yet, the universal balance also forced me to feel guilty for feeling that.
The universal question is not „why are we here?”. It’s „what are we here?”. We’re arising from our ancestral need for finding meaning outside ourselves and come to the sane approach that we are our own gods. Still, we forget that the gods are ambivalent. That we, like them, have many faces and personas. That, in order to be our gods, we need to be also our holy spirits, our parents, our children and, of course, our devil. We are arising, but we keep some of the old beliefs.
Good vs. evil. Is this even real? We still fill ourselves with the great belief that good always wins, that evil is dooming, that there are only two main colors and they are opposing. We laugh in the face of cultures who say they are both part of the whole and cannot exist separately. We tend to take sides and then regret the side we chose and take the other one.
We are our own gods. And the devil is the most human part of us.
Why do love the darker parts of us more, yet we punish ourselves for feeling? Is loving shameful? Are we really programmed like this? Is accepting your darkness part of your journey to balance?
(Morning thought: I would have made a fantastic Olympian god. If only I had a thunder.)